10 Reasons Why Reading is a Kick-Ass Self-Care Practice for Parents
Written by Kristi Yeh, LMFT
If you have young kids, maybe wait on this post and come back in a few years. In the trenches of middle of the night wakings and the physical exhaustion of raising young kids, I wasn’t reading more than a Facebook post here and there. But, once my youngest child turned four I found myself wanting to read more. I only read books that sounded fun and interesting, because reading shouldn’t feel like homework as an adult. As I started to read more, I felt more grounded, creative, and proud.
Reading hits many self-care categories, such as physical self-care (improves sleep health), emotional self-care (stress management and builds empathy), intellectual self-care (personal growth and learning), and social self-care (book clubs). You can read more about these types of self-care in The Wellness Wheel’s 9 Self-Care Categories blog post, or my book Self-Care 101: Self-Care Inspiration for Busy Parents.
Illustrated by Kristi YehHere are ten reasons why reading for fun is an excellent self-care practice for parents:
1. Escapism at its Finest (Emotional Self-Care)
Life can get overwhelming, and sometimes we need a break from reality. Reading allows us to escape into fictional realms, historical epochs, or even distant galaxies. It lets us detach from our daily worries and immerse ourselves in unique stories. Whether it's a fantasy novel that whisks us away to magical lands or a heartwarming romance, reading provides a temporary reprieve from the stresses of parenthood.
2. Stress Reduction and Relaxation (Emotional Self-Care)
In Claudia Hammond's book The Art of Rest, she explores the concept of rest and its various forms, revealing fascinating insights about relaxation and its benefits. According to a The Rest Test study in 2016, reading emerged as the most relaxing activity among respondents. Reading offers a unique form of rest, nurturing our imagination, reducing stress levels, and promoting mental well-being. Through her research, Hammond sheds light on the therapeutic power of books and their remarkable capacity to calm our minds, making them an essential tool for finding pockets of calm in a fast-paced world.
Illustrated by Kristi Yeh3. Digital Wellness and Improved Sleep (Physical Self-Care)
The National Sleep Foundation recommends putting your phone away 30 minutes before bedtime, but it can be harder than it sounds. I find it helpful to frame my digital wellness goals in terms of what I get to do instead of being on my phone, and reading is at the top of my list. Reading a paper book or using a Kindle can help you unwind, and people often fall asleep faster and have a higher quality of sleep if they read [not on a phone] before bed.
4. Connection and Community (Relational Self-Care)
Books have the power to bring people together. Joining book clubs or participating in online reading communities can foster a sense of belonging and camaraderie. Discussions about books can lead to meaningful conversations and friendships that enrich your life beyond the pages. I joined a book club with some mothers at my children’s school that I wanted to get to know better, and it provided an organic opportunity to build solid friendships over time.
If you are looking for virtual book club communities, here are a few options to explore:
Bad on Paper Podcast and Book Club
Once Upon a Book Club subscription box
Book of the Month subscription box
I also enjoy going to the library with my kids and reading next to each other on the couch with some cozy blankets. Reading and listening to some of the fantasy books my oldest child enjoys has also sparked interesting discussions and given us a new way to bond.
5. Modeling a Love of Reading for Your Children
Parents who read for pleasure set a positive example for their children. When kids see that you value and enjoy reading, they are more likely to develop a love for books and learning themselves. Reading to and with your children is the first homework assignment elementary students get in America. Depending on your child, this can be a time of struggle. However, if you let your kids lead with the types of books they are interested in, reading can be a wonderful way for the entire family to unwind before bed. As my kids have gotten older, I also relish reading my own book next to them before bedtime.
6. Empathy and Emotional Intelligence (Emotional Self-Care)
Reading exposes you to diverse characters and their life experiences. As you delve into their stories, you gain insight into different perspectives, cultures, and emotions. This exposure cultivates empathy and emotional intelligence, making you more understanding and compassionate towards others in your everyday interactions.
Parents often say they want to raise kind kids that have healthy friendships, and understanding emotions and other people’s perspectives is the foundation of empathy and emotional intelligence. One of the most effective ways to teach our children a skill is for them to watch us practice and fine tune it ourselves, which we can do by reading more books.
7. Boosting Creativity (Emotional Self-Care)
Reading sparks your imagination and creativity. When you encounter vivid descriptions and unique storytelling, it stimulates your own creativity, encouraging you to think outside the box and explore new ideas. Many writers credit their love for reading as the foundation of their passion for writing.
Here are four of my favorite books about creative practices:
Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear by Elizabeth Gilbert
Finding Your Unicorn Space: Reclaim Your Creative Life in a Too-Busy World by Eve Rodsky
The Artist’s Way: A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity by Julia Cameron
8. Mental Stimulation and Cognitive Benefits (Intellectual Self-Care)
As parents of young children, your brain often feels “mushy” due to changing hormones, sleep deprivation, and managing the huge transition of welcoming a child into your life. I had more difficulty managing my schedule and recalling basic words from my vocabulary in conversation while pregnant and during the first few years after each child was born. Being able to sustain enough focus to read after having kids made me feel proud and connected to part of my identity before becoming a mother. And although those cognitive changes can make you feel “dumber” after becoming a parent–nothing could be farther from the truth. A book that educated and empowered me after becoming a mom is The Mommy Brain: How Motherhood Makes Us Smarter by Katherine Ellison.
Reading is like a workout for your brain. It engages your mind, improves focus, and enhances cognitive abilities. As you read, your brain processes new information, builds connections, and strengthens neural pathways. This mental exercise is not only enjoyable but also helps keep your brain sharp, potentially reducing the risk of cognitive decline as you age.
9. Mindfulness and Focus (Emotional Self-Care)
Engaging in a good book requires focus and attention, which is a type of mindful activity, allowing parents to be fully present in the moment. Mindfulness is about the practice of bringing your attention to the moment with an attitude of open-mindedness and kindness, and you don’t earn extra points for meditating on a pillow for 30 minutes everyday. For parents that are not drawn to formal meditation, reading is a great way to be mindful in your everyday life.
10. Knowledge and Personal Growth (Intellectual Self-Care)
Reading is an excellent way to expand your knowledge and horizons. Whether you're diving into non-fiction books on a subject you're passionate about or exploring self-help books, every page turned is a step towards growth.
Reading personal development or parenting books can be transformative for caretakers, helping you gain insights, learn new skills, and find inspiration for your personal growth. The more you read, the more you learn, and the more equipped you become to tackle life's challenges.
“I do not feel obliged in my reading. I read to be entertained and to relax, and to go into another world, not because it’s good for me.”
Reading is a kick-ass self-care practice that packs a punch! It offers an array of benefits, from providing an escape from reality to stimulating your mind, helping you fall asleep, and cultivating empathy. As always parents, please don’t be too hard on yourself if this is not a season of reading. If reading is important to you, it will come back at some point in your parenting journey. And remember, don’t be too precious about what “counts” as reading. An audio book on your commute or a few pages now and then when your kids are happily occupied, is reading. So, whether you're into fiction, non-fiction, or poetry, grab a book, and let reading become part of your self-care ritual.
Kristi Yeh is a parent of two, and a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist who has been practicing in California for over ten years. She currently works in school-based mental health at a public elementary and middle school. A part of Kristi’s role entails discussing self-care with parents. Research shows that the better the adults take care of themselves, the healthier our children are at home and school. Yeh is also the author of Self-Care 101: Self-Care Inspiration for Busy Parents and The 3 Cs of Parental Well-Being: Curiosity, Compassion + Community.
